I mean to do a lot of things. They are listed in various places and on various mediums throughout my life. I mean to appreciate people more, tell them, show them, give to them, love them, and otherwise verb them. I mean to appreciate life more, to slow down, to not be so concerned about grades, people, quotas, and have a real conversation with a few certain people before the end of the semester. I mean to get a job, fill up my gas tank, fill up my love tank, have coffee/tea with Laura, not eat solely peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, get to know Sara, finish my papers on Luigi Pirandello and Zora Neale Hurston and Ralph Ellison respectively, not get overwhelmed over the next two weeks, and keep up with my growing collection of cool words.

I meant, tonight, to get in the car with my very loyal friend and not cry. He said it was okay though and so I did. Three tears, one on the left side, and two on the right. Then I was done. He didn't even ask why, which I appreciated, since I couldn't verbalize why. He didn't try to cheer me up, which I also appreciated, since I knew that I would be done after three measly tears. He didn't even tell me all the things I could do to make it all better, because he knows I have a long list of 'mean-to's' and adding one more could topple the whole shebang.

I probably will remain scarce for the rest of the semester; just giving you all the heads up. I'm tired and while this page is a source of therapeutic relief, I have a long list of things to do on which I'm not making very satisfactory progress.

But one of the things on that list is to make progress. So. . . I will get around to it.