I should be in bed. Or rather, I should be asleep. I'll hate myself in the morning, I know. But in five days I'll be giving a presentation on the diverse personalities of school age children, none of whom I've ever met and little about which I know. I'm thrilled, privileged, honored, and scared to death. It's nothing I haven't done before, and it's everything I love doing -- but with so little time to prepare and so much to prepare I'm feeling a little overwhelmed.

Until I remember the things I have heard which have affected me most in my short life. They are three:

Louie Giglio: On Isaiah chapter 6. "Glory. Glory. Glory. Is the Lord God Almighty. The whole earth is filled with His glory!"
Pastor Rick Sinclair: On the 'whos' telling us what for with no reason. "Who told you that?"
Mike Cavanaugh: On being a "send me" person.

Each one drove me to painful tears; each one drove me to a different awareness of who the Lord is as God, and who He is as my own. Awe. Freedom. Humility. In that order. But it isn't the messages only which remain burned in my memory -- but the presentations. The absolute transparency and humility of men who have walked and hurt and learned and imparted the greatness of God with the expectation that those who hear, really hear, will walk and hurt and learn and impart the same message to others.

So next week, and for the next month and a half, that is my prayer. That I will have an expectation that my life and my testimony are only as good as the light in which they are presented. Instead of presenting a list of personality norms and how-to's, I want to be a walking testimony of what the Lord can do with a confirmed Introverted Passive Non-Confrontational Shy Weakling. Instead of teaching rules about nature and the names of trees and plants, I want to teach them that we don't teach respect of God through respect of nature, but that we teach to honor God and, by default, we respect nature. Instead of working out staff relationships through a lens that wants to see peace, I want to model communication and servanthood in a lens that honors Christ above peace.

So I'm excited about this summer. I'm excited about these kids. I'm excited to have the stack of paperwork beside me finished. But I'm even more excited about the opportunity to constantly check my spirit and my attitude. Nothing like a good outspoken child to keep me on my toes.